impossible job opportunities

[deanwebb]

Cisco Certified Internetwork Expert (CCIE) certificate required
CompTIA networking certifications preferred

Call me an idiot but didn't compTIA networking certificate is a really required for Desktop support that didn't touch the LAN cable? Not at all. Don't even think of touching it...

"Well, we have two CCIE candidates, one with CompTIA and one without. Now, the one without-"

"Hold on there. Go with the one that has CompTIA. It's a no-brainer. We said it was preferred for a reason!"

TESTIMONIAL ON COMPTIA CERT PAGE SOMEWHERE:

"Sure, I have a CCIE, but it was my CompTIA cert that clinched the interview for me!"

Be right back, I need to renew my Belkin cert...

[DesertFox]

What the ... is Belkin certificate? I really like the junior security position when CISSP is required 

[SimonV]

Scope of responsibility does include all Company's WLAN,WAN/LAN, servers, applications, development aids/tools, databases, cabling, data and voice-related infrastructures. Position requires 24x7 on call service for enterprise networking services.

Thanks, but no thanks 

[Nerm]

CCIE is for the birds that Belkin Cert is where it's at. Lol

[Otanx]

Position requires 24x7 on call service for enterprise networking services.

Nope, nope, and nope. If you have 24x7 requirements you need to staff for 24x7 requirements. That means a minimum of six people if nobody goes on vacation or is sick. Nine would be better.

-Otanx

[deanwebb]

So I see this, a job req for my equivalent position:

https://www.forescout.com/company/careers/open-positions/?p=job%2FoApc9fw4

And notice that travel is 40%. It was 30% when I applied... hmmm...

[Otanx]

Time to ask the boss for a raise.

-Otanx

[icecream-guy]

So I see this, a job req for my equivalent position:

https://www.forescout.com/company/careers/open-positions/?p=job%2FoApc9fw4

And notice that travel is 40%. It was 30% when I applied... hmmm...

mmm... what's all this other crap

[deanwebb]

That's so we can get metrics!

I know the jobvite is for our HR system. Google tag manager is what it sounds like. Cloudflare is to make sure you're not a spammer.

[DesertFox]

This one is for security guy  - The EU institutions are looking for officers and assistants in the fields of security operations, technical security and information and document security.

You must be an EU citizen and know at least two official EU languages, one of which must be English or French.

To apply as an officer, you need a university degree of at least 4 years followed by at least 6 years' professional experience in the area of security relevant to the duties concerned or a university degree of at least 3 years followed by at least 7 years' relevant professional experience. You can also apply if you have equivalent professional training attested by a diploma or a certificate issued by a higher education institution or by a public institution such as a police, military or intelligence academy, followed by at least 7 years' relevant professional experience.

The position of assistant requires a post-secondary diploma relevant to the nature of the duties, or professional training equivalent to European Qualification Framework Level 5, followed by at least 3 years of relevant work experience. You can also apply if you have a diploma giving access to post-secondary education or if you have had professional training (equivalent to European Qualification Framework Level 4) both followed by at least 6 years of relevant work experience.


I would really like to see somebody from Greece / Romania / Bulgaria for example, that knows only French and no English.

[deanwebb]

I would really like to see somebody from Greece / Romania / Bulgaria for example, that knows only French and no English.

THIS

[deanwebb]

Helping out a friend that's just passed her CCENT exam. So here is a tier 2 job I came across...

Skills:
4+ years customer support/help desk experience
Strong communication, interpersonal, and analytical skills
Ability and desire to provide excellent customer-service
Ability to work independently and communicate clearly in a dynamic environment
Knowledge of and experience working with cellular support (Android and ios)
Knowledge of and experience working with Windows, MAC
Knowledge of and experience working with Citrix
Knowledge of and experience working with stringent SLAs
Knowledge of and experience working with cellular support (Android and ios)
Knowledge of and experience working with virtual support
Knowledge and experience with Windows OS (Windows 7, Windows 10)
Knowledge of and experience working with Remedy
Knowledge of and experience working with SCCM
Experience with detailed documentation and ticketing