impossible job opportunities

icecream-guy · March 24, 2015, 03:54:38 PM

leave out the wherewithalls and whowithalls detail stuff

Job Requirements
Requirements -Minimum 7 years in Information Technology, including experience in supporting data networks required. -Expert knowledge required on Cisco switching and routing, network protocols and firewalls. -Four year degree from an accredited institution -Industry certifications for routing, switching and network engineering and support are preferred. -Experience managing technical projects is preferred. -Experience managing communications with management, customers and vendors is preferred. - 4 or more years with load balancers -Understanding of firewall, IDS and network security standards - 3 or more years with Linux or Windows OS, MS networking, storage, virtualized environments, network and system monitoring and scripting -Demonstrated ability to consistently follow a disciplined troubleshooting methodology -Communication with technical staff, IT management, internal customers and external vendors during outages -Project management and communications with technical staff, IT management, internal customers and external vendors during IT projects -Configuration of routers and switches (Cisco) -Configuration of security and load balancing appliances (multiple vendors) -Documentation, using Visio and office automation applications - Experience with Vmware and Microsoft Active Directory (design, migrations, use of elements like group policies, etc.) is a plus -Understanding of communications/telecommunications circuits **For immediate consideration........

deanwebb · March 24, 2015, 06:24:03 PM

Got the 7 years, got network support, got um, not quite expert on the switching and routing, got the degree, got certs, wait, MANAGING PROJECTS? 4 years of load balancers, 3 years of OS - I guess I should be earning experience in parallel - more management and now VMware... AD architecture... *and* voice???

"For immediate consideration" that means either the last guy to claim to have all this LIED and he got fired yesterday, or, more likely, this is a mid-sized company trying to get by with a small company style one-man-show.

I'll pass.

that1guy15 · March 24, 2015, 07:14:17 PM

My guess is the previous engineer was a rockstar who moved on to bigger and better and they need someone to pick up where he left off. If not then this job should be paying a shit-ton of money!

I could reasonably check off ~75% of these but feel comfortable with about 50%

config t · March 25, 2015, 04:01:38 PM

When I see job postings like this I'm always thinking to myself, "Holy crap, people this bad a$$ actually exist!?"

jay9821 · March 31, 2015, 06:08:25 PM

I swear that as someone who is seeking an entry level position this how every job posting looks. Lol

that1guy15 · March 31, 2015, 07:22:27 PM

Quote from: jay9821 on March 31, 2015, 06:08:25 PM
I swear that as someone who is seeking an entry level position this how every job posting looks. Lol

My rule is if you can do 50% of what they are asking then apply. Usually its a wish-list or them expecting more than the market can provide.

jay9821 · March 31, 2015, 07:42:24 PM

Good rule. In the past I usually looked for jobs I know I can do some aspects and knew in could learn the others quickly.

But seriously, I was eye balling a level 1 help position that required a bachelors in computer science and 5 years experience.

that1guy15 · March 31, 2015, 09:19:31 PM

Fun thing is i dont spend much time on the requirements section. I have always focused on the job/company description.
-Is this going to be a good fit for me?
-Does this company sound fun?
- Does this sound like shit?

Its hard to tell this in the first few years as you really dont know what to look for or you just want a GD job. But over time you will feel them out.

Its pretty much like your 20's and sex. 95% of the time you are rejected but you keep pushing because eventually you score!!

routerdork · April 01, 2015, 08:54:35 AM

Quote from: that1guy15 on March 31, 2015, 09:19:31 PM
Its pretty much like your 20's and sex. 95% of the time you are rejected but you keep pushing because eventually you score!!

jay9821 · April 01, 2015, 09:00:48 AM

So true, I'm currently in the medical field just wanting the hell out! Lol which is one of a few reasons why I joined this forum, gain knowledge, ask advice, plus you all seem cool fro what I've seen.

I have 2 phone interviews today, ones for an internship, other is a level 1 help desk. So hopefully one will be my ticket to ride lol

that1guy15 · April 01, 2015, 09:35:41 AM

Quote from: jay9821 on April 01, 2015, 09:00:48 AM
So true, I'm currently in the medical field just wanting the hell out! Lol which is one of a few reasons why I joined this forum, gain knowledge, ask advice, plus you all seem cool fro what I've seen.

I have 2 phone interviews today, ones for an internship, other is a level 1 help desk. So hopefully one will be my ticket to ride lol

Best of luck dude!! Kill em. Dont be afraid to say you dont know something and make sure you highlight your desire to push and grow.

deanwebb · April 01, 2015, 10:31:56 AM

^ +1

"I don't know" are possibly the three best words you can say in an interview. Say them with confidence, like you do want to know that stuff, but just haven't been exposed to it yet. It may mean that's the first thing you get trained on.

Otanx · April 01, 2015, 10:55:26 AM

To expand on the "I don't know" topic. Don't just say "I don't know" say "I don't know, but I would <insert how you could find the answer>" It shows that you not only understand that you don't know everything, but that you know how to find information you don't know.

-Otanx

hizzo3 · April 02, 2015, 06:05:04 PM

Quote from: Otanx on April 01, 2015, 10:55:26 AM
To expand on the "I don't know" topic. Don't just say "I don't know" say "I don't know, but I would <insert how you could find the answer>" It shows that you not only understand that you don't know everything, but that you know how to find information you don't know.

-Otanx

I don't know, but I can google it.

jay9821 · April 02, 2015, 06:43:07 PM

Yeah Google is amazing.

Thanks for the advice guys, got a second interview for the Thompson Reuters PAID internship, it went amazing. This one sounds perfect, but the screening process is intense and the internship itself I have heard is rigorous. But they offer full time and benefits after.

The other was for Robert Half. Went extremely well but them being a staffing firm, their standards are much lower. But this a temp position and should be wrapping up right around the start of next semester.

Seriously guys, thank you. These were the things I needed to hear. I was stressing and psyching myself out due to the lack of real world experience I have.